Wednesday, January 20, 2010

and then the goddesses said, "let some light shine down on that girl"....

.....and that's just what happened.
Today......the dark clouds started to break away and the sun, I'll swear to ya, began to push its way though (in spite of the rain that was falling here in the city).

Before I go on......I want to say a huge "thank you" to those of you who left comments on my last post. I appreciate the support and advice on how to get out of this state of grumpiness I seem to have taken residence.
I took a bubble bath....drank some wine (actually, Japanese plum wine...homemade even!), tried to escape from my family for a bit and spent some time over at YouTube watching some really funny and cute videos.
I spent some quality time with Debbie....THAT hadn't happened for a long time. Though the reasons for the bitchiness are all still there, I think I have a better handle on it.

While I was on the Internet, I found something interesting....there was an article from some newspaper, by the spelling of certain words, I'm going to venture a guess and say it was from London...just guessing, though, I could be wrong.
Anyway, it said something to the fact that....
being sad is good because it makes you stronger and better able to cope with life's challenges. We need to learn to embrace our sadness (or depression) and then we will be motivated to make our lives better.

Finally. An official reason to have a pity party.

Then, on Monday....I was in the class that has been reading books by Patricia MacClachlan (Do you remember when I called and talked to her?!?!). We are now reading Cassie Binegar. We got to one part and something that Ms. MacClachlan wrote really reached out and grabbed me.

" is filled with small perfect moments that are only there for a short time. And then gone. Like catching snow on your hand."
The writer smiled. "Catching snow," he murmured.
"What do you think?" asked Cassie.
"I think," said the writer, "that catching snow is wonderful." He grinned at her.
"Just wonderful."

After class, I sat in the parking lot in my car just thinking about that.
Catching snow.
That's what I've been missing.
"Catching snow."
If I paid better attention to all the snow catching moments, maybe things will not seem so dreary.

So....I have embraced my sadness...took it to lunch today, even...and am now making a better effort to find some of that snow to catch.

Here's some "snow" I caught so far:

~~Spending the day with Issei...having burgers and fries for lunch...then picking out some great glasses...observing his total 11-year-old embarrassement when some college girls said he looked kokoii (cute!) in one pair of very cool frames.

~~During the snow we had last week, I went to pick up Koji after school....on our way home, upon seeing a pretty good sized space with beautiful 'virgin' snow, he proceeded to drop his bag and then run to a spot, yelling "Snow angel!!!" He made one...a pretty good one, then thought he needed another.....
I was laughing so hard, I almost couldn't get the picture!!!

~~Am I the only one that thought our snowman looked like a Shriner???
~~One daisy...peeking up through the snow.

~~The neighbors' car with the little snowmen all across the the way, our neighbors? Yeah...they are in their late 50's and live with their parents....and their own children
are grown and gone.
Some people catch their snow and do wonderful things.

~~Taking a nice afternoon walk on a cold day with sunshine for just a short bit of time.

~~Walking around our yard with the boys and looking at all the interesting ways the snow had piled up: on the laundry clips..... the branches of the trees....

....and how it made our orange tree look really pretty.

Things are getting better....
and here I'll be...
waiting for the next "snow".


Nancy said...

I am so glad that you have found your inner strength to start catching the snow! I think that sometimes that is the hardest part. I truly believe that taking time to appreciate those little but amazing moments can really help us deal with the bigger not so amazing moments. Big big hugs to you!!

BTW- Did you let Koji know that its easier to make snow angels on your back? not face down in the snow!! LOL!!

smalltownmom said...

Here's to catching snow and small perfect moments!

Janet said...

TOTALLY looks like a shriner!!! Love the shot of you :-)

Mommy2Twinkies-Deb said...


I'm so glad that you're feeling better, and some of the things that you have tried (espeically the Debbie time) has made a difference. Perhaps if you didn't make Debbie time, you wouldn't have read that book and you wouldn't have started catching your snowflakes.

I love the photos, and I love the way you've embraced life. My favorite is the one of you at the end. So cute!


Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

That picture looks like a happier-looking Debbie for sure.

Cid said...

What a wonderful post, it made me smile. I am having more than a little me time, six days away from the boys. Today I didn't catch snow but I found the most tiny, perfect seashells on the beach which I will bring home to remind me of my time away.

phd in yogurtry said...

I don't know about a shriner snowman, but he certainly looks like he's sporting an aggie scarf!

And I just love your little passage about "catching snow". I'm writing that one down (or pasting, as the case may be). Sounds exactly like something this doctor would have ordered : )

Shellie said...

Great post and I am so glad that you are on the up hill path to the Debbie I know and care about so much. Life catches us off guard and it seems like the sun will never shine bright. Chin Up and smile.

Yarni Gras! said...

love all your photos! And I agree, that snowman DOES look like a Shriner! LOL